


Humans vs. Zombies

by Eloarei



Category: Hanna Is Not A Boy's Name
Genre: Fun and Games, Gen, Humans vs. Zombies, Sports
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-07
Updated: 2012-11-07
Packaged: 2017-11-18 04:26:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/556888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eloarei/pseuds/Eloarei
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Hanna and his undead roommate quite effectively switch places.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Humans vs. Zombies

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by an article I read about a popular college game, "Humans vs. Zombies". Wiki it if you're not familiar. =) "Cardona" is a reference from the article; just imagine a well-known and talented player.

It was about 8 o'clock on a lovely summer evening when Hanna came home from his part time job, far more excited than working at a department store should rightfully make him. 

“Hector! They're playing humans versus zombies, let's go!!!” 

Hanna was already tapping his feet impatiently and wiggling his fingers in intense anticipation, but his roommate was understandably confused. 

“...What?” 

“Humans versus zombies!” Hanna shouted, as if yelling more loudly made his meaning more clear. “I just saw Veser on my way home, and he said that his college was hosting a game tonight and he could get us in.” 

This explanation did little to help the man's understanding. “This is... a game?” 

“Yeah, of course!” Hanna responded. “And I wanna get to the park before they start!” 

The whole situation still didn't make much sense to him, but he shrugged and followed the fidgety redhead out the door. A brisk 5 minute walk found the two of them at the local park, which was packed with energetic people who appeared roughly Hanna's age. They were about to pick their way through the crowd towards the center of the park, but Veser found them first. 

“Hey, you guys came, awesome!” 

Following him were several familiar-looking figures. Toni, her black and blue hair put up in curly pig-tails, waved at them cheerfully. Conrad stood awkwardly beside her with his hands in his pockets, shifting uncomfortably. Doc Worth was also there, smoking a cigarette and looking as at-ease as ever. Hanna caught his eye, but he shrugged, giving no excuse as to why he decided to show up to a silly game filled with crazy college students. 

The group greeted each other and then wandered into the pack of eager participants towards the fountain in the center of the park. 

A tall brown-haired guy was standing in the center of the crowd with his arms above his head. “In five minutes we will be starting our second annual humans versus zombies game! But first I need to explain the rules so we don't have any newcomers making an ass out of themselves!” He proceeded to outline the basic rules, something about bandanas, safe-zones, and 5-minute stun, and then they were on their way to one of the big tents set up in the field to collect their ID cards and equipment. 

Hanna's roommate wasn't sure quite what he thought of this whole thing. A few people were shooting him funny looks, and one had even laughed and said, “Wow, you're sure ready to lose, aren't you?” He pointedly ignored any of this awkward socialization, and went about his business. 

Maybe three minutes later and he emerged from the crowd, back onto the field, sporting a reflective orange bandana around one arm, and a balled-up sock in one hand. “Hanna?” he called, but the redhead was out of sight; he'd lost him some time during the rush for Nerf guns. 

_Well, it's just a game,_ he thought, still glancing around for a glimpse of the short redhead. _He can't get in_ too _much trouble. Probably._ Deciding to trust Hanna with his own safety for once (a choice he still wasn't too sure about), he shrugged and waited dutifully for the starting signal. (He still hardly understood the game, but figured he'd probably figure it out along the way.)

About seven minutes into the game, and he still hadn't seen Hanna. The humans (or, in his case “human”, as he was currently considered) were still mostly standing around, a bit tensely, and waiting suspiciously for the arrival of the first “zombie”. It was only a moment later when a tiny person darted out of the largest crowd and into a big empty spot in the middle of the field, visible to all. A bright bandana was wrapped around his almost-equally bright hair, and his thin arms were raised high in the air as he took a big breath and yelled triumphantly, “I AM CARDONA!” followed by cackling, maniacal laughter. 

_Ah, so that's where he went._

The crowd's reaction was mixed. About half of them stood staring at the apparently crazy grade-school student who'd somehow weaseled his way into their game. A good chunk of the others shuddered at “Cardona”, and took off running in the opposite direction, while the remaining players cocked their Nerf guns (or readied their sock-throwing arms) and charged at the defenseless “Original Zombie”. 

Throughout this, the tall man pretty much stood and stared. 

Hanna did an amazing job of avoiding the humans' socks and Nerf darts. He dodged them with a grace nobody would have expected, ducking in and out of players, and tagging them along the way. Soon, the army of combatant humans had become an army of combatant “zombies”, and they spread out to viciously stalk their remaining human prey. 

Hanna had since disappeared from sight, and his deadpan roommate found he only had to defend himself against a few rogue “zombie” attacks; most of them ignored him, possibly assuming he was on their side. 

It wasn't long (only an hour or so, which was no time at all in HvZ terms, he would later be told) before the “zombies” had completely taken over the park, and the man found himself to be the only remaining “human”. 

“There's one left!” someone shouted from the tent, having checked the stack of ID cards and found one still missing. The other players scanned the horizons and headed off to the far corners of the park to search, but their gazes ghosted right over the man they were looking for. Eventually they lost confidence and convened in a circle around their leader, hoping for some sage advice. And after a moment of deliberation, a self-assured, mischievous look came upon Hanna's war-reddened face. He turned his head from side to side, narrowing his eyes behind his thick-rimmed glasses, until his gaze fell upon a face so familiar to him. The 5'3”, 24-year-old paranormal investigator puffed up his chest, threw back his shoulders, and marched steadily up to his roommate. 

“I guess it turns out that you're an even better human than the rest of us.” He stared at the taller man for a moment, but the serious look on his face dissolved into a silly grin as he lost the ability to pretend he was someone else. “And I make a pretty awesome zombie, don't I?!” 

The man smiled back, the corners of his eyes crinkling. “A wonderful one,” he affirmed, ruffling the boy's hair. 

The rest of the crowd was stunned silent as they watched the completely illogical display of affection between a “human” and “zombie”. But then they realized that the last human had finally come in contact with one of their own (of his own accord, but even so), signaling the end to their game, and they cheered. 

Hanna tore the bandana from around his head, and the two joined the crowd on their way back to the tent, shoulder-to-shoulder and still grinning from what they considered an evening well-spent.


End file.
